Cody & Julianna: Adoption Classes

Monday, April 28, 2008

Adoption Classes

Last weekend Julianna and I attended classes for couples seeking adoption. We really didn't know what to expect, but after two long days of sitting on uncomfortable chairs, we realized we could have stayed for another two days. Rather than "tell us" about the process, they brought in excellent panels of couples who had adopted, birth mothers, bi-racial and foster parent families, and adults who were adopted as children. It was fascinating to hear each individual story. It was evident to us that the Lord has a soft spot for adoption situations and his care is prevalent throughout. There were many miracles in the room and each reaffirmed our hope to one day have this miracle in our life.

After hearing an adoptive couple tell their success story in a very personal way, we left in awe. There was so much to "chew on" and were silent on the whole drive home. A slice of pizza and a Diet Coke from "The Pie" helped us digest the experience. We both felt, as we have all along, that this is the path we need to follow. The adoption process is a blessing for both the birth parents and the adoptive parents.

Truth is, we have never done this before and neither have most birth parents and it is a learning process. It confirmed to us the need to be very sensitive and flexible to each others needs --ultimately the spirit will guide the ebbs and flows. Most of all, this process has brought us closer and more appreciative of what birth parents go through. All of them love their babies. All of them wanted the best for them. And all of them felt directed towards the adoptive parents. A few of the birth mothers that spoke were 15 years old yet they were unbelievably composed. Their spiritual maturity was evident as they expressed the importance of having their baby sealed to a forever family -- which they knew they couldn't provide at that time. They had been dealt a difficult hand at a young age and somehow had enough foresight for their baby and themselves, to make a good decision often in the middle of lack of support from some family and friends. We were truly amazed by each person we met.

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About Me: Julianna

I was born in a small town in Tennessee. We lived there until I was in the fifth grade -- what a great place to grow up! In the nearby woods, we would play "house" by designing floor plans with sticks as our walls and a piles of leaves for furniture. As a child, I loved to play games, ride bikes and play barbies. With a family of six kids, often my dad would engage us in a game of hide and go seek to wear us out for bedtime. Or, my dad would play "wild music" on the piano and let us dance around to get our wiggles out for bed. Looking back, I think we must have been a high energy group of kids. This might be why we only could have "sweet cereal" on Saturdays. However, on Christmas morning, each child got their own box; which would be gone by the next day. My poor parents... 6 kids hopped up on sugar plus the Christmas chaos! Our family of 8 then moved to Ft. Worth, Texas. We happily adjusted to Texas BBQ Brisket and Blue Bell Ice Cream. We took advantage of our location and would visit my dad's parents in El Paso for vacations. My grandma made us feel like her greatest treasure. During high school I couldn't wait to DRIVE! After parallel parking an enormous green station wagon, I passed the driving test and had my license in hand. I was very social. My brother Jeff and I were very active in our church youth program. I participated in plays, church volleyball and basketball. I loved going to youth conferences and would sew new outfits. My sewing career was short lived...I'm too much of a perfectionist and would spend more time pulling out stitches rather than sewing them in. I left this talent to my mother and sisters. In high school, I helped to make homecoming floats, joined the pep squad and the German Club; which really was a party with the cutest guys at school. Ummm yeah, I think I have been boy crazy since I was 12. My crushes' names would end up in the doodling of my school notes. At age 12 I may have seen one too many soap operas when I stayed one summer in El Paso with my Aunt Barbara! College was creeping up and I needed money. Therefore, I've had a job ever since I was 15 working for a sandwich store, gelato ice cream store, Dunkin' Donuts (gained 10 pounds in my first month and saw the necessity to quit!) and as a receptionist my senior year for an attorney (work release program). After high school, I went to BYU and LOVED my independence. At age 21, I took an 18 month break from college to serve a mission in the Arizona Temple Visitor Center. By far, this experience was one of the highlights of my life--serving and loving the people of Mesa. Before graduating with my Bachelors in Education, I went to study abroad to Israel for four months. I learned about the Jewish and Muslim cultures, religions and histories... fascinating! I will always have a sincere respect for the rich history taken place on that soil. During my first three years of teaching first and second grade, I earned and graduated with a Masters in Education. I continued to teach in Utah for a few more years. I loved teaching but wanted to find new opportunities to stretch myself in the field. I moved to Washington, D.C. and began to work as a literacy trainer (of teachers) for a non-profit in Baltimore, Maryland. For four years, I had the wonderful opportunity to help improve children's education in inner city schools. My favorite memories were those of helping young children find and cultivate the love of reading. The success of learning to read increased their self worth and opened doors of opportunities in their future. I continued a similar position with George Washington University working with the DC public schools, teachers and students. I loved my time of living in D.C. Many opportunities helped me to appreciate and learn of our nation's history. I'm such a "hands-on learner." Knowing this about myself, I took advantage of my location and traveled to a few countries across the Atlantic Ocean to learn of their cultures and histories. D.C. will always be an important chapter of my life filled with wonderful friends --and of course, where I originally met Cody. In 2005, I returned to Utah and began teaching second grade. This is when I became reacquainted with Cody and our life together started its course.

About Me: Cody

I was born and spent the majority of my childhood in Bountiful, Utah, a suburb of Salt Lake City. I was a fairly social kid and spent more time than a normal 5 year old visiting all the senior citizens in my neighborhood who had nicknamed me “Windy”. Apparently, I talked a lot. I was just there for the Iced Oatmeal Cookies sitting on their kitchen counter. So I would talk and talk until I could close the deal and walk away with my Iced Oatmeal cookies. I think they knew what my intentions were and would milk me in their boredom. Just give me the cookie! The steep hills of Bountiful provided the perfect childhood existence. Steep hills for sledding and skiing in the winter and the twisty streets made great neighborhood night games and Olympics in the summer. Life really is simple as a kid and maybe it is best to enjoy the first portion of your life in a relative blissful ignorance. Mom and I followed Dad to Juneau, Alaska for my 9th grade year, as part of Dad's work in developing mining operations. After a year of playing football on a rocky dirt field with a team of female line(wo)men, I was glad to move home and be a part of Bountiful High School's first back to back high school football championship. I really had great friends and was active in choir, madrigals, student government and sports. I bought my first car when I was 15 ½ (it supposedly sat in the garage for the next few months while I waited to turn 16) with my own money. I worked at Farmers Insurance at nights and mowed lawns in the summers. This was my first experience in just how expensive life was going to be. Either that, or I had high expectations of myself and what I wanted to accomplish, but I did learn early on that you'll get out what you put into something. My parents, to their credit, really stressed work work work. This undoubtedly helped me day in and day out when serving an LDS Church mission to Alabama. It drove me nuts to see the lack of work ethic some of the other missionaries had. Spending two years performing community service and other church activities was probably the most difficult but most worthwhile challenge in my life to that point. But, the best part is that none of it is for yourself. Service is a great thing to learn at 19 years of age. Following my mission I attended the University of Utah and received a degree in Business Management (Finance) while working full time and was active in student government, Sigma Chi Fraternity and participated as a moderator for a weekly radio and TV show called Coffee and Politics. During my senior year, I received an internship in Washington DC, which completely changed the direction I thought I was headed. I loved the energy and great minds I met and worked with in Washington. Following graduation I worked in New York City for an internet start up that eventually closed its doors following the events of Sept. 11. I jumped at the chance to move to Washington DC and began working for U.S. Senator John Ensign shortly after. I spent four years working on healthcare and financial industry policy before heading to Las Vegas to do some campaign work. In August of 2005, Mom and I took my Grandma and Grandpa Meyer to visit the sites of Washington DC. The whole time I lived there, I really hoped it would work out that they could come and visit and could show them around. We had a great time and on our last day I took them to a favorite Saturday morning market and breakfast joint called Eastern Market. As fate now has it, I ran into a mutual good friend, Jill Chappell, who told me Julianna was moving to Salt Lake. I am getting ahead of myself. Let me start at the beginning...

OUR STORY
A couple of years ago in D.C., I had taken Julianna out a few times. We got to know each other over Mexican food at three different locations. However, at the end of our third date, instead of inviting me in, she gave me a luke warm side hug at the door. I understand girls have this need to be pursued but an awkward hug doesn't really lend itself to an “oh baby baby” hot pursuit! Please. So, three years later, our story picks up again when I ran into Jill at Eastern Market. She wasting no time reacquainting us, called Julianna and handed me the phone. Julianna asked me if I could take a precious duffle bag of shoes she didn't have room for on the plane. These were essential items needed for her first week of work in Utah. With lack of time in heading to the airport, she met me in front of the Smithsonian on the Washington Mall for the handoff. The day she arrived in Salt Lake, she called to get her shoes. I was in Houston at the time and promised her bag of shoes at the end of the week in exchange for a dinner of steak fajitas. I think in her mind this meant two things: the comforts of Mexican food and a reason to buy new shoes until her own arrived safely. After our date of steak fajitas, it all went quickly from there.